on your marks...

i want to start a beauty blog but cn't think of a name for it

i'm always trying to find people to write about the tx that i'm always getting so have decided just to do it myself.

also think i need a bit of housekeeping on all my web id's...watch this space!

fucking god damn fuck

i know i'm trying to watch my language but god damn it.
my new loverboy blondie and i are trying to get married and to even get an appointment it is ?60 and you have to both bring passports...which not everyone has...like him, as he's English! so other form of acceptable ID? driver's license...but neither of us fucking drive! not everyone drives. Stupid Stupid Stupid!

so i need to clear my flat...FAST

i will be listing stuff that i am going to be giving away free on this blog as well as over at snaffle!

watch these spaces...

well that didn't take long...

and he has masters of the universe pillow cases!

i think this blog is going to go quiet for awhile - i might even just delete it.

unhappiness project

i am so drained...just feeling empty.
this evening's solo relationship therapy session was harrowing...the fiance didn't make it as he's busy working and also thinks he pretty much knows everything i'm going to say - yes, he might but i need somewhere like that to discuss things.

instead i did that alone, and i'm sitting at home alone.
and i hate alone.

my weight has pretty much stabilised.
hardly any appetite at all.
luckily no cramps today.

and i so want to be happy but just wonder - when is it okay to be unhappy?
(sorry gretchen!)

eating

back down to 87.3 kilos - but means i have not met my target of a kilo a week for the last two weeks. ok - some of it may be down to getting my neck lipo'd and not able to work out for a week or so, but still - i wanted to look good for when the scandos arrive on bank holiday weekend! and also i know i've probaby been nervous eating...waiting for my mother's biopsy results to come through tomoro.

so am sending as many good vibes and prayers as possible to her tonight.
she must be soo stressed waiting.